I.
how I hate
the day –!
quiet –, without breaks
my fingers bruise out blood
from hatred, hatred
constantly –
and my eyes have
become blind coals
of hatred –
but see I can – always –
the day I hate,
the day –
II.
which strange
for all the world enforcing
necessary force I
must have been, since
I’ve been set
hopelessly in
the day of hunger –
hopelessly, I realize my hatred –
but see, see
I can – always –!
– – –
without me knowing
the slightest of it,
the people of hunger
must have been given
a column of goodness
through me –
aah ridiculous, says my hatred,
hopeless –?
but I realize:
necessary to give
this goodness here –
– – –
nobody knows, but
to see – always –
is the worst –
most glorious –
III.
why am I yelling,
I am yelling –
but where –?
there exists no ear
mightily to pluck
a whisper
wholly –,
loving to demand
a truth
pure as the foot of heaven
on the night of reality –
– – –
but complain –
never –
I have only to
chop and chop –,
until my heart
is free and hangs
like a black lantern
of balance in the middle
of the day –
– – –
how should
a mission be outspoken?
never in all eternity here –!
but after the last stroke of freedom,
I know, where I live,
I the seeing kid of the night –
aah I long, although
the day still
awaits my heart –,
against the naturalness,
against the abyss –
for see, I can –,
always – the night,
where I am born –!
IV.
what owns
a child of the night,
other than this certainty:
that no dream has
lied a word –,
that the smile of hunger
on the lips of day
are impurity –
and hunger the day’s
hole fulfillment –
V.
my mightiest dream is
the dream of the messenger –:
in clothes of blue and
with a white garland,
he shall come from
my homeland –:
clear and mute shall
he stand –, and
mute with my homeland’s certainty
I will lay myself
to him –
– – –
and he shall not have
any weapon with him,
because of the country,
he is from –,
and my laughter and my
tears shall stay with
my sacrifice in the day –:
there’s too much clarity,
where I am born –,
and its wall is way too
careless for
laughter-cheek
tear-tooth –
o, you clarity over
the wall of my homeland –!
VI.
o, if you could understand,
that true happiness
is eternal like the
laps of a wave and
the rain of the moon –
o, I aspire nothing
else than this same
in eternity there,
in my homeland,
where I have
given birth to my happiness –
– – –
fruit and yet more fruit
my beloved picks
out of my lap, and
gives me, yet before
I smile –
and when I whisper:
“this is too huge –
must I then die here,
where I am at home –“,
then a dream shall answer:
“you have dreamt so
strongly, that this exists
out of
your loyalty’s power –“
and another dream
shall bow and from
the night take, what
I don’t need to
aspire for –, and from the heavens
grab, what I always,
always have known, was
my most precious
my inner-most –
o night, my homeland –!
– – –
what can the child of night
win
during the day,
other than this certainty,
which is the way,
the only
leading to my homeland –
VII.
when the messenger comes,
and hatred falls from
my features like
the dry hunger of day –,
humans shall be blinded by
a beauty, blasting everything –
and they shall cover
their eyes and mumble:
“all perishes,
death is upon us –“
but their dreams shall
arise and bear witness:
that the homeland is
one sole sun-spreading fulfillment
of the highest –,
one night for all
of eternal clarity,
built on the immortal
shoulders of creation-dreams –
– – –
and through the grass of my homeland
it sighs
happy-heavy
under the foot of the slightest:
“holy night, where
the sun has found its bride –“
VIII.
I see:
my hatred was white as the day –
but my dreams shall be
the all –
– – –
o, what am I except
my mightiest dream –
and, what is the greatest and
the slightest except
their mightiest, most
careless dream –!
– – –
when the messenger comes,
I will breathe to his breast:
never, never have
I ceased to see this –!
and when I raise my eyes,
he shall open his mouth
and yet again mention me
in my homeland –